Ask any couple how their wedding planning is going with only a few weeks to go, and you’re guaranteed to hear a rant of some sort on guests, and RSVPing – or the lack thereof! As tempting as it is to spitefully leave them off the seating plan and pointedly mention they didn’t actually say they were coming… don’t. The thought of them turning up will stress you out and distract you from enjoying the guests who did RSVP!
How to follow up wedding guests who haven't RSVPed by the deadline
Remember, they may think they have RSVPed. Perhaps they told your Dad at the rugby game, expecting him to pass it on (yeah right). Maybe they posted the RSVP card back and forgot to add a stamp. More than likely, one half of the couple thinks their other half has RSVP'ed already, and vice versa! Approach your guests with this mindset and you'll avoid offending anyone who has done their duty.
If there are a lot of missing RSVPs, then consider enlisting a parent, your fiancé or bridesmaids to help chase. If they have a closer personal connection to the guest, they may have better luck eliciting a response when they reach out. I know I'd be more likely to flick back a casual "yep, just trying to sort the babysitter" to a close friend than replying to a message from my partner's workmate's fiancee that I've only met once.
It's also likely that some guests will be dragging the chain because they can't make the wedding. They could be shy or embarrassed about saying no directly. I know all you want is a response! But people don't like to let other people down, and so they could be procrastinating. Following up with them is really doing them a favour... which leads us to...
Using the magic RSVP email
When all else fails and you still have stragglers, never fear! We have the solution. Once your RSVP date has passed, chase your slack non-RSVPing wedding guests with our magic RSVP email. Send out a blanket email (use the BCC function) and remind them firmly - but politely -:
“Hey everyone, I really need to get confirmed numbers from our wedding guests ASAP – got to keep the caterers happy! If we haven’t heard from you by Monday, I’ll have to assume you can’t make it. Looking forward to catching up at a later date. Love, The Nearlyweds”.
This message is great because it gives you certainty for your final numbers, saves you from dealing with guests who ignore or ghost your message, and puts the 'blame' on someone other than you (the 'caterers'). Give it a try and see how you get on!
And if you're reading this post but haven't sent your wedding invitations yet, then be sure to read up on the best practices for setting an RSVP date, because hitting that sweet spot can save you all sorts of grief.
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